I had a whirlwind trip to Rochester, NY for work yesterday and today, and it will go down in my personal history as some of the least pleasant travel ever.

Yesterday, we flew through Newark (a.k.a. the seventh ring of hell). We did ultimately make it to Rochester, though, but not before spending two hours on the runway in Seattle and the balance of the four hour delay in the terminal in Newark. Given that five other flights at neighboring gates in Newark were cancelled, I’ll count myself sort of lucky.

Today’s flights back took us through Detroit – nearly as malodorous as Newark, but without as many air traffic delays (we were only an hour late today). On the completely, 100%, no-way-in-hell-you’re-getting-a-different-seat full flight from Detroit to Seattle, I got to sit in the middle seat, next to a nearly spherical woman. She had trouble standing or walking, and definitely couldn’t sit in her chair without overflowing both into the aisle and into my seat. She kept trying to make small talk while nearly cutting off the circulation in my arm and scrunching me up against the surly woman sitting by the window. Don’t be too jealous.

Since I just got in a little while ago (around 11 PM), and I have no clue what day it is, what time zone I’m in, how long it will take me to fall asleep, or if my coughing is a result of illness or a physical manifestation of my feelings towards the airline industry right now, I’m thinking I might not go in to work first thing in the morning. And I’m keeping my fingers crossed things go better when I head to Pittsburgh on Saturday to visit Matt.